Play Guide - Social and Emotional Development 1 - 2 years
Toddlers are much more emotional than babies, he now knows his own mind and boy do you know it. As he approaches the ’terrible twos’ he might become more and more wilful and obstinate, however, by the same token this period is one during which he will show you enormous love.
To help you in your interactions with him in these twelve months, particularly on the social and emotional front, here are some day to day tips :
Don’t pander to his moods- Pay attention to behaviour you want to encourage - not to behaviour you would rather discourage. Remember he’ll do almost anything to get your attention so if you give him that when he’s moody, he’ll do it more often.
Eat together as a family- go on outings. Make clear to him that you are a special social unit.
Test if he recognises himself- Put some lipstick on a finger (or your lips) and smudge it onto his forehead while he is not looking. Hold him in front of the mirror. Does he reach for his forehead? If he does, he is now realising the person in the mirror is the same person that you talk to.
Games
* Song of love *
Build the emotional bond between you by sharing a loving song or two in quiet muments. Touch is very important so as you sing stroke or soothe him.
* A book to share *
Cuddle up together and read a book. This is great on all levels. It helps with social and emotional development as well as building an early love of books.
* A toy to share *
He plays all the time, but make sure you take the time to join in, if he’s playing with his toy kitchen ask if you can have a cup of tea.
* Chase a baby *
He can now walk so crawling becomes a fun time activity. Get down on hands and knees and chase him about.
* Feed a baby *
Practicing to nurture and care for others is often one of the earliest pretend games. Encourage him to care for his teddies or dolls, feeding them with bowl and spoon, or putting them to bed. This kind of play is great for social and emotional development as it helps him to put himself in others shoes and think about someone elses needs.
* If you’re happy and you know it *
Enjoy action rhymes together, they’re great fun!
One of the best is “If You’re Happy and You Know It!” You just can’t help but be happy!
If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.
If you are happy and you know it clap your hands
If you’re happy and you know it and you really want to show it
If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.
If you’re happy and you know it stamp your feet
If you’re happy and you know it stamp your feet
If you’re happy and you know it and you really want to show it
If you’re happy and you know it stamp your feet
* Hippity hoppity *
Activities and play that you do together are great for stimulating social and emotional development, because these games reinforce the bond between you, helping him to feel safe and secure in the knowledge that you care.
When out for a walk you could both
Creep like a mouse
Hop like a rabbit
Trot like a horse.
Or he could go on your back while you carry out the actions!
Play Guide - Social and Emotional Development 2 - 3 Years
His social development will come in leaps and bounds when he is old enough to play with other children. Although children like being with other children before they are two it really isn’t until the third year when their lives extend beyond family and carers.
He will start being more considerate of people when they are upset, to learn to read moods a little more. Although this is great, he might also start to worry more too! During this time, he might start to be frightened of things that he wasn’t at all worried about before. During this time things like ghosties and monsters might start to feature in his concerns!
By the second half of this year, he will have become more easy going, more caring and more social. His tantrums should hopefully be on the decline too!
Games
* Finding faces *
This kind of play helps reinforce ideas of other people’s feeling and emotions.
Flick through a magazine together
Count how many smiley faces you can see?
How many sad faces are there?
Play at drawing faces and seeing if he can tell how they feel
Stories
Children love stories they can join in with and reading books together is great for your together time - look for books which have repeated phrases such as “I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down “ from the three little pigs. Read these often and get him to join in. The three Billy goats Gruff, Chicken Licken and Red Riding Hood are obvious examples.
Whispers
A good game for a child who always shouts!
* Whisper to your child what he should do next.
* He then does it.
* Then he whispers to you.
Here we go round the mulberry bush for one or two
Imitating is a social skill and games that encourage this are good choices. Here we go round the mulberry bush is a classic...
You can play this by dancing round in a circle but you don’t have to;
“Here we go round the mulberry bush, the mulberry bush the mulberry bush,
Here we go round the mulberry bush on a cold and frosty morning.
(Then he stops and mimes as you sing)
This is the way we brush our hair, brush our hair, brush our hair,
This is the way we brush our hair on a cold and frosty morning
(You can now add any action you like!)
Snap
Cards and board games are good social games but lots are too difficult for the under threes.
A whole pack of cards is probably too much for him now, but you can take a chunk of the pack. Shuffle them and deal them out and play a game of simple Snap!
You could also try a simple game of lotto.
Copy cat
Play a game of copying faces!
* You pull a funny face - he copies.
* He pulls a funny face you copy.
Helping
At this age he doesn’t know the difference between work and play so he will be more than happy helping you with the housework!
He could
* Wash the salad greens
* Dust a coffee table.
* Collect the post or newspaper.
* Post a letter.
Play Guide - Social and Emotional Development 3 - 5 years
According to a recent survey, around 10% of school children don’t have a friend. As families are spending less time discussing things over meals and safety concerns mean children spend less time playing out with friends, it is more important than ever to practice social and emotional skills through play and daily routine.
Games
* Monsters *
Children play through their worries by incorporating them into games. A child who is afraid of monsters will love to dress up as one.
- Take an old pillowcase, cut out eye holes and put it over her head
- Make sure you also cut holes for her arms!
- Use a head band to keep the costume place
- Now all she has to do is scare people!
* No hose pipe ban! *
Children love to be silly and get really excited. One way to guarantee laughter and fun is a to get the hose pipe out on a hot day. This is a good game to break the ice between children and ensure laughs.
- Let the children run in and out of the water
- Or chase them round with the water
- Or both!
* Shark infested waters *
Another game that is great for more than one child to play, that is guaranteed to break the ice.
- Lay out paper plates in a path on the garden.
- The children must step from one plate to the next without falling in the shark infested waters!
* Duck duck goose *
This is a good game for at least four children.
- Children sit in a circle
- One is picked to be ’it’
- The one who is ’it’ walks around the circle tapping them on the head saying ’duck’, ’duck’, ’duck’
- Without warning she suddenly says ’goose’ instead and then starts to run around the circle
- The child she picked to be goose must run after her and try to make it back to her space in the circle first.
- Whoever is left standing is ’it’
* Baby clinic *
Role play is great for developing social skill. Playing at 'baby clinic' is a good one for more than two children.
- Set up a waiting room with chairs
- Scales to weigh the baby
- Tape measure to measure her
- Dolls and teddies to act as babies
Because small children remember actions much better than they do words, action rhymes are brilliant.
The actions help the child to remember long songs, they also help draw the child’s attention to the little sounds that make up words – an important pre-reading skill. Action rhymes are a good option for those muments when you might be hanging about with no access to toys, waiting in line, for a bus or on a long journey for example.
This kind of rhyme is great for letting off steam, improving memory and stimulating communication.
From 6 months
*Five little ducks*
The five little ducks are the fingers, five swim away, four come back, four swim away and three come back- and so on until there are no little ducks left! Five little ducks went swimming one day
Over the ponds and far away
Mother duck said quack, quack, quack
But only four little ducks came back
From 9 months
One two three four five
One two three four five
Once I caught a fish alive
Why did you let him go
Because he bit my finger so
Which finger did he bite?
This little finger on the right.
Count out the fingers on the one two- make a biting mouth with the thumb and index finger, then display the little finger of the right hand.
*Incy Wincy spider*
Incy Wincy spider climbing up the spout
Down came the rain and washed the spider out
Out came the sunshine dried up all the rain
And incy wincy spider climed the spout again.
Incy climbs by touching opposite thumb and index finger and alternating fingers and thumbs. The other actions just mirror the words.
From 18 months
*Peter’s hammers*
Peter works with one hammer (Hammer with one fist)
With one hammer, with one hammer
Peter works with one hammer
All day long
*Verses*
Peter works with two hammers (hammer with both fists)
Peter works with three hammers (add one stamping foot)
Peter works with four hammers (add the other foot)
Peter works with five hammers (add the head)
*Row, row, row your boat*
Row, row, row your boat
Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily
Life is but a dream.
Children sit facing each other on the floor, hold hands and rock back and forth
*I hear Thunder*
I hear thunder I hear thunder (stamp feet)<
Hark don’t you, hark don’t you (put hand behind ear)
Pitter-patter raindrops (mime)
I’m wet through (point to self)
So are you (point to her)
*I’m a Little Teapot*
I’m a little teapot short and stout
Here’s my handle (Put one arm on hip)
Here’s my spout (Put other arm out like spout)
When I hear the tea cups hear me shout
Tip me up and pour me out (bend to the side in a pouring action)
When your child is still an infant, once he is able to hold his head up, he will love to enjoy a song with you on your lap.
Singing along with songs like this help develop him develop socially and emotionally as he’ll love the comfort of spending this time with you. He’ll also learn about the rhythm in language. Songs that have a jump or action at the end also help him to learn to expect – to know that something is going to happen.
When he is very young, sit him on your knee facing you and hold him around his waist. When he’s a little older you can hold him by the hands.
Jogging on the Knee
For these songs, jog and jiggle him on your knee as you repeat the words.
*Ride A Cock Horse*
Ride a cock horse to Bambury Cross
To see a fine lady get on a white horse
With rings on her fingers
And bells on her toes
She shall have music
Wherever she goes.
*To Market to Market*
To market to market to buy a fat pig
Home again home again jiggity jig
To market to market to buy a fat hog
Home again home again
Jiggity jog.
Rides with a Jog and Surprise!
These songs feature a surprise fall at the end to make him giggle.
*This is the way the ladies ride*
This is the way the ladies ride trip trot, trit trot trip trot
This is the way the gentlemen ride gallup gallup gallup
This is the way the old man rides. Hobble-dee hobble-dee
And down in a ditch
Trot on the knee at varying speeds- then open your knees to let her fall through a little.
*Father mother and uncle John*
Father, Mother and Uncle John
Road to the doctors one by one,
Father fell off Mother fell off
But Uncle John road on and on
Ride on the knee, hold him tightly and let him jog to one side and then the other.
Rides with an Up and a Down
*Leg over leg over*
Leg over leg over
The dog went to dover
When he came to a style
Up he went over
Cross your legs and sit him on the crook of your foot. Hold her hands and jog her up and down – but every time you say 'over' move your foot up and down. She’ll feel like she’s flying!
Sometimes the old ones are the best, a selection of traditional games.
Traditional games have been played and perfected by generations of children for hundreds of years. Some of them are very different from their original form, but many have remained almost the same throughout history. These traditional games help teach children vital skills – the reason they didn’t die out years ago!
*Traditional games help to develop many skills*:
* Social skills – learning to play with other people, taking turns, making friends and also putting yourself in someone else’s shoes.
* Predictive skills – what will he do next? Is he going to drop something?
* Physical skills – turning, dodging and getting lots of exercise * Letting off steam
* Learning ’I can do it’.
Traffic lights
One person says the word of their choice from the list, the others do the appropriate actions - the last one to do it is out (but you can leave this bit out of the game if you want to)
Red means stop
Green means go
Crash means lie flat
Bridge means make an arch on the ground.
Farmer Farmer may we cross?
Farmer farmer may we cross your golden river?
Yes if you are wearing red (or what every colour the farmer decides)
Those in red walk across the rest have to run and avoid the farmer catching them
Red lion
Red lion sits in his den, the rest of the players have a second den which they leave to taunt the lion
Red Lion red lion come out of your den
Whoever you catch can be one of your men
When the chant finishes the red lion chases everyone home, if he touches anyone they must go to his den. Next go they become lions too. The game ends when everyone is a lion.
The Farmers in his Den
One child stands in the middle of the ring while the others walk around singing
The farmers in his den
The farmers in his den E-I-N-G-O
The farmers in his den.
The farmer must then choose someone to join him as the children sing
The farmer wants a wife The farmer wants a wife
E-I-N-G-O
The farmers wants a wife.
Then other children join the central group as the circle sings
The wife wants a child, etc
The child wants a dog etc
The dog wants a bone. Etc
In the last verse everyone pats the bone
We all pat the bone We all pat the bone
E-I-N-G-O We all pat the bone.
Kick the can
This is one of the many variations of tag. The person who is ’it’ has a can or object which he must guard, but must also leave to catch other children. If anyone kicks the can he must return and put it back before he can chase again.
Hiding games
* Hide and seek “It” hides his face and counts to twenty while everyone else hides. Then after shouting “coming ready or not she goes in search of the other players. * Bug in a rug. In this game you race “It” for home if you get there first you are safe.
* Cuckoo – a reversal of normal hide and seek in which one player hides the others seek * Toad in the hole- if you are found, you join the seekers. The game ends when everyone is looking and there is no-one left to find.
Grandmother’s footsteps
This game is for a group of children. One of them is picked to be ’grandmother’. She stands with her back to the rest of the children who line up a few metres behind her.
The group must try to creep up behind grandmother without her seeing them. Every so often, grandmother turns around to look at the group and they must stand perfectly still. IF she sees them move, they must go back to the start.
The first person to touch grandmother’s back without being seen wins and becomes grandmother next time.
Oranges and Lemons
Oranges and lemons say the bells of St Clements
When will you pay me say the bells of Old Bailey When I grow rich Say the bells of Shoreditch
When will that be say the bells of Stepney
I’m sure I don’t know says the great bell of Bow.
Her comes a candle to light you to bed
Here comes a chopper to chop of your head.
Chip Chop chip chop.
Two people make an arch and the rest dance through it in turn singing the song. On the last “chop” the arch catches someone- by dropping there arms down to surround them. They then ask “Orange or Lemon”. Oranges go behind one of the arch makers, lemons go behind the other. When everyone has been caught they have a tug of war.
*
Play & Learn activities reprinted from "Preschooler Play & Learn" with permission of its author, Penny Warner, and its publisher, Meadowbrook Press (2000.)
